Don't make the mistakes I made. Unless you too want to be over 35 and still single. You young ones heed the warning. I'm all for being independent and all that happy horse shit but when it comes to men and dating you have to accept some basic truths. Things I didn't want to accept and now realize I screwed up. I read many signs wrong and that let me allow myself to date the wrong men when I was in my 20's and early 30's. I thought I was so modern. Well get over it. Men are men at the core. Let them be. If they aren't showing you how much they want to take care of you and how good a life they can give you...MOVE ON. Don't say to yourself that you're a modern woman blah blah blah! Because the only one getting played is YOU. They are loving it and taking advantage of it but they aren't gonna marry it.
Don't believe me? OK suffer.
I'm going to give you a few tips on some red flags. Maybe just maybe if you all start dumping men who behave like this, more men would give up on their games and step up. Win win!
Here's one I can give you straight from the latest experience I had online with a dating site:
The "gentleman" and I spoke on the phone. BLAH BLAH BLAH...all about himself. BORING. Then told me about his supposed day on 9/11.
Sorry girls but this is lame. I'm a New Yorker. I lived through that horrible day. But to use that on a first phone call is pathetic. And I'm not buying it. If a guy does this to you RUN. It's a scam to get you to feel badly for him. Do you REALLY want to be with someone who is trying to mentally manipulate you from the first call?
But it gets worse. I ignore his requests to speak and I tell him I am busy. He hounds me to please meet up. I reluctantly agree and outline only as friends and suggest coffee.
Here's the next red flag...as if that weren't enough:
He tells me to pick the location.
Ladies don't do it. Under no circumstances should you be picking a place. Not on a first date. NEVER. This is lame lame lame and LAME! Oh did I mention it was LAME! Oh and LAZY!
Men need to be showing us a good time. Yes I said NEED. It's not just for us. It's for them. They need this. They need to feel this way. And if they aren't guess what? They just aren't that into you. PERIOD. So don't make up female excuses for why this is OK with you. Men are NOT like us. They don't think like we do. In fact they don't think all that much about anything. It's much more black and white with them.
So there you have it ladies. Two solid pointers to get you started. Don't date the losers and guess what? They will stop being losers. We all win that way.
Oh yes, the ending to this saga, I almost forgot...
When I politely told him that I am traditional and believe men should be choosing the location and making the plans I got "closed." Not another word written. Not a "good luck to ya", not a "I'm sorry I changed my mind." NOTHING.
